"No-Ponch Pledge"

Now, I am all about crocheted fashions. I take a lot of pride in wearing garments created by my own two little hands. But the dreaded "poncho" is one item that will never be crafted by the hands of this crocheting diva! To ensure this fact, I have taken the "No-Poncho Pledge":

"I Erica B. swear on the head and/or the grave of my sainted granny to never wear, buy, knit, crochet, or fashion from the old throw rug, the poncho. And if the poncho it is given to me as the gift, I will graciously thank the giver and then, when she has left, put the poncho into the dog's bed and/or the trash as the case she may be. Only by doing these things faithfully can I help end for the good of the humanity the scourge that is the poncho. So help me Erica B."